Friday, December 31, 2010

Dec.31/2010

2 more hours till the new hour begins and its all very exciting. never knowing what to expect in the future, never knowing how things will turn out but its goin to be a new year and its going to be good.

living in an entirely new environment was hard but fun once you get adjusted. im learning alot of new things as i go through the days as a university student and its all exciting and scary. the experience cannot be described in words but its certainly an adventure you wouldnt want to miss out on.

coming home for the christmas/winter break was definetly the best thing i decided to do. i forgot how much i missed my old life and old ways and now that its coming to an end, i dont want to return to the states =/ im so use to everyone pampering me and being spoiled so being on my own and doing everything on my own gets quite tiring after awhile. but being independent is what i wanted...was the reason i wanted to be so far away from home.

i cant wait for the new year to begin and the new semester to start! ill be keeping you posted hopefully regularly about the happenings of my life but til then, happy new years to you all and i wish u all the best in 2011!!

Monday, November 8, 2010

Nov.8/2010

life is full of surprises; whether they are good or bad, you learn to accept them and deal with them. there are people who can put you down and people who can bring you up. ive learned from my mistakes. let go of the people who have been hurting you. no matter how much you still feel for them, no matter how much theyve done for u in the past because at the end, theyll just end up bringing you down and its really not worth it. what we should be doing is investing our time into the people who have brought this far and the people who are willing to face the hard trials with you no matter what.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Oct. 13/2010

when midterms are rolling in, u know its the time for cramming information into your brain and not having a social life. but thank goodness at the end of it all, we get a break to just have fun and relax.

yesterday i went to watch the Chinese Acrobats in our school gym and let me tell you...it was amazing! it would leave u completely speechless for the things they can do. its just such a surprise what those people can do with their bodies!! wayy too flexible to be a normal human body. but it was just simply awweesomee and it was completely packed because i COULD NOT breathe from being in there....way too crowded but was worth the suffication =p

not much has been going on since we are all busy with school and exams coming up. i went to the hair salon yesterday to get my hair done and i told that lady i wanted the brown and she said the color wont come out as much cause its dark and my hair is already dark so she gave me a blonde O_o haha dont worry, my hair didnt come out blonde but almost. the top part of my hair is pretty much...golden/blonde/brown and the whole part from my ears and down are dark brown but luckily today, after i showered, its not as light as yesterday so...its all good =) i actually like this light color but i wish it was all around and not just the top =/ apparently by ends are really hard to dye heh

im excited for this week cause my mother has sent me some winter clothing and i should be getting it on fri and my friend just sent me my contacts that arrived so i should be getting them soon too! =) oh how i miss those days with contacts...made my life so much easier haha im just not use to wearing glasses which is a weird thing because i've practically wore glasses my whole life up until last year but i feel more comfortable with contacts =S so instead of seeing me with blue eyes, you'd be seeing me with black one! =p

hey b, havent heard or talked to you lately....saw that u no longer have facebook? what's been going on? my calling doesnt work on my phone so i cant call you...but id love to hear from ya! text me or email me or whatever....just let me know that all is good and everything is okay...having me alittle worried here =/ miss ya!

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Oct.7/2010

wow...can u believe its october already! time seems to fly by so fast nowadays...i mean next thing u know, ill be graduating from this university! haha mayb not that soon but....hopefully not that far from now! =S

the weather here is getting colder and colder now...and then it gets hotter and hotter....and colder and colder...the weather is bipolar here! >=l but it makes sense to get a little chilly here cause winter is coming! haha i heard it doesnt snow much here...in fact, it doesnt snow at all. they said if u see snow...the city is never prepared with the roads and stuff cause it..JUST NEVER SNOWS!! what kind of place is this....im starting to wonder about this area haha but i like it better here than being at home with parents and goin to univeristy there!

midterms are coming up in about 2 weeks O_o i think im doin okay in my classes EXCEPT music theory =/ still struggling in that class and barely making my way through....but ill make it...somehow....someway....somday....=p i thought university was so much more fun...atleast it seemed like it at the beginning! ....they tricked me >.>

alittle less than 2 weeks and its my bday! but im not all that excited this year...simply cause im not home to celebrate with my parents and close relatives and cause theres nothing to do here so....=/ but theres a break on my bday til mon so...thats somewhat of a celebration! haha...so i checked my mailbox yesterday and my parents sent me a card and present...but mainly for the reason cause i had some forms to fill out a.s.a.p so thats why it came so early. but the card brought me to tears and it just made me realize how important my mother is to me and how much i love her more and more everyday from being apart from her. IK HOUD VAN YOU MAMA =)

thanks for your "letter" b! it was definetly an "awwee" moment and you just made me realize how much u mean to me and im so glad that we met...although most people wouldn't approve that way haha but you're always there for me whenever im in need and u always find ways to put that smile on my face and i love you for that ^_^ i hope im as good as a friend as u are to me! im really really really really excited that we get to hang out over the nov break!! or atleast planning to! =) everyday, i look forward to talking to you cause you are just the one thing that makes my day complete and i dont know what i would do without yooouu! P.S there will be no naruto in that little house of ours! >=l

well, im off to convocation and then to lunch and then to boredom! haha today is going to be a free day....oh what to do!

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Sept. 26/2010

its been awhile since i updated this thing of mine =p hmm...lets see whats new...not much! haha pretty school, school, and some more school! yay! haha there isnt much going on lately except...school...yeah boring i know. anyways, some of my friends decided to leave me this weekend...surprisingly, alot of people went home this weekend. it was like some one-month mark or whatever but i stayed here...not like i had a choice!

well, not much happened over the weekend. went to church, hung out with some friends and went to LAC party...Latin American Club Party on saturday night. it wasnt as bad as some people said it was suppose to be...haha i think we all just enjoyed the half naked men that had their body painted for that event...all the abs and muscles =L haha anyways!! saturday night was a weird night...ended up talking to a friend the whole night after til 1 in the morning and we nearly forgot about our curfew! just 3 girls and 3 guys just sitting outside having our own little convos and then PEW! time flies by. =/ was a fun night/talk but honestly, people get ideas in their heads and wont let them go and it can get so annoying sometimes. =/ i was talking to Qwynn the whole night while Lee was talking to Daniel and Christin was talkin to Vonerik and all they do is tease me about Qwynn when they should be thinking about themselves. honestly, the less drama the better. is it too much to ask to have a normal non-drama life for once? IM TIRED OF IT! >=l

i think i need to go to an all girls school to advoid all this boy stuff...or maybe ill just move with my friend in san fran...you can be the only guy i know brandon! =) hahaha with our nice little house and audi carS...haha yes..theres an "s" after audi cars =p anyways, im off to play alittle pool before the night ends...and i hope everyone had a good weekend! =)

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Aug. 28/2010

How can things go so right and then go so wrong so fast? Sometimes I think that I get everything and then the next minute, without even heads up, I am the most confused girl on this planet earth.

Well anyways, the fall semester has offically began and my schedule is pretty easy this time...so everyone is telling me to get a job to fill up my spaces but I'm sure I can find something to do to fill up those spaces =) I'm only taking 3 music classes and a math class and an english class. So far, in my music class i took a music theory test and totally bombed it >.> and in english..well we just talked..well the teacher just talked and talked but I was so happy to find out most of my close friends are in the same class as me! =) haha I just saw them walk in one by one like OH HEY!..*next person walks in* OMGSH YOURE IN THIS CLASS TOO?! *next person walks in* W O W haha yeah..its gonna be an aweesomee semester hopefully! I guess it'll only be good depending how what you make of it!

I haven't updated in awhile...in my own words xD i'm always using song lyrics to show how I feel but today..I dont know...I guess i just have a lot on my mind and its just getting too heavy for my heart to hold so I thought I'd let some of it out! More updates to come!! but i dont promise it'll be my own words ^_^

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Aug. 19/2010

count on me

if you ever find yourself stuck in the middle of the sea
ill sail the world to find you
if u ever find yourself lost in the dark and you cant see
ill be the light to guide you
find out what we're made of
what we're called to help our friends in need

you can count on me like 123 ill be there
and i know when i need it i can count on you
like 432 and youll be there
cause that's what friends are suppose to do

if you toss and you turn and you just cant fall asleep
ill sing a song beside you
and if you ever forget how much you really mean to me
everyday ill remind you

you'll always have my shoulder to cry on
ill never let go, never say goodbye

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

July.27/2010

-ay ay ay-

some people say i shouldnt be with you because you dont deserve me
they say that i shouldnt believe but they dont understand
that baby with you, every single day is brand new and i aint going nowhere
im staying right here, its the right idea, so right for my baby

ay ay always want to be with you and i dont want to change you
ay ay love every little thing you do and i dont want to change you
ay ay dont ever want to say goodbye and i dont want to change you
as long as you dont change your mind there will always be you and ay

boy you should know i never leave
i know its cliche but the air i breathe they try to take, they try to suffocate
no im not going to stand
baby with you every single day is brand new and i aint going nowhere

you look worried but dont you worry
that thing we got is as strong as a rock
lonely nights we've been through it, fights we've been through it
so how you gonna think this time how they gonna do it
they hating on us, yes they know we a team
like your juice and im gin
like you rock and i lean
yeah they want to do it, the way we do it, but they cant do it, the way we do it

July.27/2010

-moving on-

i cant wait til you're gone away, cause then i can move
then i can say im finally over you
you say that you are no longer in love with me
and you cant be the one for me
told me this love of ours is taking us down different roads
and its caused us to grow apart so..

dont say to me that you want to be good friends with me
thats just teasing me, boy its best you leave, say goodbye to me

Friday, July 23, 2010

July.23/2010

-war-
i would march across the desert to defeat my enemy
and i would lie here in the trenches with your picture next to me
and when i told you its forever, then thats how its gonna be
wont let her just take the place of me

does she really know you like i know you, all the little things
does she really love you like i love you, how can he compete
if he makes me fight for you, die for you, would he do the same?
this is turning into way more than a game

now it feels like soldiers in a war and none of us are backing down
and i will show you victory is mine before we leave this battleground
cause she dont want to leave and i dont want to go
and i know just how this battle goes
she dont want to leave and i dont want to fight this kind of war

you know shes not the man she thinks she is, shes hiding all her flaws
so tell me whats the point in fighting because we'll all end up with scars
but boy if thats what i must go through then im not prepared to lose
cause ive already bied so much for you

getting kind of sick of this battle
wish i could take it back to when i had you
im always thinking that i can have you, just let her have you
its getting kind of hard to convince you

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

July.21/2010

i hate the mornings cause i know what they bring
you get up, take a shower and in no time youre leaving
and it sounds so selfish but i cant help but think
that how much i needed you you'd stay cause..

i hate goodbyes, i hate these tears in my eyes
i hate myself for the way i feel about you everytime
ive had enough, im sick of wishing he was around me everyday, everynight
its way too much, i hate love

i hate your phone calls in the middle of the day
it drives me crazy cause i need you with me
i dont want to feel this alone
everytime you walk out that door, i start missing you
wish i didnt need you this much

July.21/2010

L..O..V..E..

tired of being in the "when am i gonna find love club"
i come close, get a dose but it just aint enough
right guy wrong time right time wrong guy
whats the use? why even try?
whats the rush, getting caught up and then its over
now im crushed and im crying and theres no shoulder
it plays out so different in my dream, things aint always what they seem
and thats why..

i dont get excited when someone brings me flowers
aint gonna be sitting on my phone more than an hour
it hurts but i still run to it, oh i hate love
scared of what it does to me but i just got to have it
been right in my reach but for some reason i cant grab it
love keeps hating on me so i hate love

dont want to hear nobody telling me they needing more time
questioning where i been all up in mine
new guy old lines old guy new lies
the more that i say the less that i mean it
i just want somebody for me
the more that i see it, the more that i want it
but i need something that makes me believe
they tell me one day it'll be worth the wait
but i dont want to hurt on the way
so im not gonna settle, i know better
so understand what i say..

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

July.13/2010

Since I was a little girl I knew what I wanted
One day I would see the world and make my mark on it
Put in time, sacrificed never thought of thinking twice
Since I was a little girl I dreamed
Now I'm standing in this terminal
With a ticket so far from your love

I'm in a rush I got to fly away
Planes waiting up for me right at gate twenty-three
There's a doorway to my dreams
I could go or I could stay
Should I change my life or miss my flight?

My alarm clock in the morning said you got to go now
Wish I never heard that clock ring
See I don't want to win if my hearts got to lose
So how in the world do I choose?

How can you messure the promise of love
When it's weighing against a chance that comes once
How can I leave when I know he's the one
When the dust settles he might now be here
And I'm standing in this terminal
Crying my eyes out in tears

Thursday, July 1, 2010

July.1/2010

HAPPY CANADA DAY EVERYONE!!! =)..oh and happy bday grandma!! =p wish i could see the fireworks in canada but..i guess ill have to wait til next time!

omg today was soo hot it was hardly breathable =S had a pretty good day today..went to have lunch with a relative(aunt) and then went on those one day cruises for a couple hours. haha thank goodness that girl knew how to translate in english or else i wouldve fallen asleep like my grandma did xD haha and then we went shopping at this place...didnt find stuff that really caught my attention but theres plenty more time to do that..and then went to the same place that we went to go eat lunch to eat dinner XD its jus hilarious to see your grandparents and your relatives fight for the bill..so i just stood up and went to pay the bill myself and just told them its done and over with. haha they looked at me like they didnt understand what i was saying =p

im just gonna keep the blog short today...not in a good mood today...well actually i am but..idk just some stuff bothering me..but it'll pass! haha okay well til next time! =)

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

June.30/2010

the past few days have been soo rushed! grad for 2 days and then pack the next day and headed to holland and when i return to canada, the next day ill be off to the states for school! talk about jetlag...how will i ever study this way? =S

so grad....well there isnt much to say but it was the bomb! haha everyone looked hot and the program went smootly...pretty good for the schools first time having a grad! now they can learn for the years to come =p haha okay so right after grad on sat night i went to hang out with the class and we went to go eat til like 12ish in the morning and i was in no mood to sleep so we decided to go to the beach but i ended up not goin at the end cause i had to wake up early and do a load of stuff and pack so i just went home =/

okay so next day i get up kinda earlyish and start doing the stuff on my list cause i wanted to go out for dinner with a friend one last time but i got into shit for that..=/ i told my mom i was goin with a bunch of friends but then after dinner we went to the park and my phone went out of batt so she couldnt get a hold of me and i couldnt get a hold of her(and no..my friends phone decided to act up and not allow any calls but txts..) so anyways after awhile at the park i decided to leave and i went to the nearest payphone and called my mom and of course she was very mad and found out that it was only us two who went and stuff. so apparently everyone was looking for my friend cause he was suppose to be at this teachers house for a studying session which he told me he went to but he didnt...so his mom and everyone called my house and stuff cause they knew he was hanging out with me..=S so anyways i got picked up..and my mom thought i was jus ignoring her calls but my phone really ran out of batts! =/ so anyways she got really mad and was like "oh ur not goin on that holland trip anymore and blah blah blah" so i woke up the next day and my dads like dont sleep too late cause u still have things to pack haha so it turns out i AM goin! well...here i am now! in holland just chillin at 6am..been up since 4ish 5 O_o im gonna be soo tired later! =/

i dont even want to talk about the way here....i hated that feeling so much...lets just say it was...horrible =p

anyways i think im gonna head back to bed and mayb try and sleep for another 2 hours or so..haha =)

:: even though we're far away, know that ill always be there to stay ::

Sunday, June 20, 2010

June.20/2010

I feel chained; chained down u shoved me to the ground
I cant run, I cant shout; just let me out
So heartless, this couldnt mean less
Gonna push it in your face, im only human and ive got something to say

Let me rise let me fall let me breathe
I wanna lose control im not afraid to lose it all
Let me break let me crawl
Cause i will get back up again if you let me fall

If I burn down in this fire well, ive got myself to blame
I cant stop or give it up, i need to feel the pain
Can u hear me, dont come near me you'll just get in my way

Say you know who i am and what im about
Then you'll understand that i feel alone, i live my own life

Saturday, June 12, 2010

June.13/2010

U left me once again but this time...ill be waiting for u and never giving up ^_^

Monday, June 7, 2010

June.7//2010

i have no clue why but i feel so...happy today!! haha its so weird cause im so cheerful..not saying that im not but i just feel...good! =)i didnt do anything in particular to make me feel this way and i didnt eat anything but...haha man oh man do i feel good!! ^_^

so tomorrow will hopefully be as sunny as today cause im going out and i hate going out in the wet rain and cold wind =/ so anyways, after school, me and a friend (John Mac)are planning on watching a movie but i dont think we'll have enough time for that cause by the time we get to the mall it'll be 4 and we have to be back at school by 6 cause we have a show!! =) i miss being in that show every year =/ basically, the gymnastics team perform a show for us and then the band and choir perform a couple songs...i use to be in all those!!! i hate how they dont offer it to us anymore T.T

okay well i think ill meet up with my friends at the mall while hanging out with John cause theyre all gonna be there anyways to waste some time until the show starts. so hopefully it'll be an exciting day tmr =)

i did my grad speech today...well it wasnt exactly a speech..more like answering three questions and someones recording you doing it like an interview so we can put it together and make a video out of it haha but it'll be awweesome for memories in the future =p so anyways i took like FOREVER to get mine over with cause i kept screwing up and forgetting what to say and just kept laughing the whole time cause my friends were in the room and they were making these funny faces behind the camera at me and i just couldnt help but break out into laughter haha oh how i love you guys <3 but now that thats over with..i get my grad pics tomorow!! my teacher has been holding them hostage until we did our speech recording =.=

so anyways, i had a real urge to go out biking today but i just remembered that i need to pump my bike wheels and...possibly get a helmet xD haha i know i know...if i get caught without one..i would get a penalty fine but whatever LOL so anyways ima go and pump my wheels and go for a spin!! =p

:: you look good wearing anything but you look extra smexy wearing that shirt ;) ::

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

June.1/2010

its finally the month of june..ahhh how did this come by so fast? usually when the end is nearing, it should be a relief that school is finally going to be done/over with but i feel so stressed for the exams and provincials =S well actually theres nothing to be stressed about...i dont even need to study considering i got accepted already into universities..then im good to go! haha but i still need to do better!

i was checking my mail today and got this email from La Sierra..it told me that i have around $8000 scholarship and theres another one from the music department but i have to contact them about that. i quickly became all smiles and immediately called my mother hoping this would change her mind...but i forgot she was at work so of course she didnt pick up >.> anyways so im dying to tell her tonight and see her reaction and possibly hope to change her mind. LETS CROSS OUR FINGERS PEOPLE!! =p

dont u just hate it when you're friends with someone...and then you guys start getting close and they just have to develop feelings for you and now its all awkward after you find out. well technically, he doesnt know that i know but its just all different now. but i guess its only awkward cause i dont feel the same way and besides..hes younger than mee...which doesnt really matter but its just an excuse haha but im sure its just a phase for him so im just waiting until its over and we can be good friends again =)

okay well im off to do some research about some oil spill close by =S i cant believe we have to do a speech about it tomorow =/ anyways! ill update you on what happens later on~

Monday, May 31, 2010

May.31/2010

so when something goes wrong in your life...at the end, theres always something that comes out positive from the situation. in this case, it was a special someone who helped me through my hard times and struggles.

when you're so close to reaching your goals and dreams, u almost feel invincible and u feel this joy and happiness overflowing through you...but then its just too good to be true. something or someone just always has to come around and stomp all over your plans and ruin everything for you. well in this situation, its my mother. >=l she has like everything planned out for me...for my whole life; according to the way she wants my life to be...and the way i want to live my life is just out of the question. in highschool, i would understand if she tried to control my life leading me to the right direction but now that im going into college...shouldnt it be my choice?? shouldnt i be able to choose what to do with the rest of my life? so why is she still in control telling me what to do!? its bad enough that shes making me change universities last minute but for me to change what i want to major into..!? if youre doing something you dont enjoy, youre not goin to put much effor into it. doesnt she get that being a doctor or lawyer or something to do with tons and tons of money just isnt my thing...well mayb the money part is =p anyways, i have absolutely no say in this since shes the one paying for my tuition so again...im under her command. i thought that i would finally be free when she allowed me to go to California to go schooling...but again, it was all too good to be true.

just when i thought i found the key to unlock my chains....it turns out to be the wrong key. (<----haha i got that from ur msn status brandon! xD) well anyways..im determined to find the right key...someday =p

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

May.26/2010

365 Days dreaming of you
8760 Hours thinking of you
525600 Minutes missing you
315360000 milli seconds

just wanted to tell you how much you mean to me =)

P.S happy birthday mommy! i love you forever & always! <3

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

May.25/2010

All day I've been wanting to see your face. I can't seem to focus on any of my work. The smile on your face make me want to confess to you that i like you without realizing. I like being just a friend to you if it means that I'll be by your side. I don't want to forget you cause you're my most important friend. You're my best friend but you can't be my boyfriend. Whenever I look at you, I know you would only look back at me as just a friend. You're my everything but i cant confess to you so you live inside my heart. Whenever im staring at you as more than a friend, without even realizing my heart starts to ache. Im afraid my true feelings will show so i try to hide it to myself. Im slowly growing farther away from you. From now on when i'm by your side, ill see you only as a good friend but i'll still cherish you as much as i like you.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

May.20/2010

i dont know why but this has been stuck in my head for some time and i think if i wrote it out, it will slowly leave me =p

Loneliness sends a dark wind that doesn't leave. Remembering the excitement of love. The sky so red,the warmth so strong. Your face surfaces in my heart, living together in this city's maze, every mention of your name causes my heart to skip a beat, and yet we don't meet again. Only the touch remains. And yet we don't dare to touch emotionally. Perhaps we really were too young. From our cluelessness. Wandering our separate skies. Allowing each other to choose what to say, but this longing still turns. A hand that can't be held is now an anonymous friend. But my attachment is still persistent and you have nothing to do with the tears I swallow.

haha that has absolutely nothing to do with anything! =p jus thought maybe if i shared..it would get out of my head...if any of it even makes sense LOL

so anyways, im goin camping soon a.k.a tomorow! but i heard the weather isnt very good while the weather here is goin to be sunny all the way =/ the only reason why im excited is the people that are gonna be/goin there. other than that...its totally bull heh =p

so yesterday, i opened my email and saw that La Sierra sent me an email and when it opened it....BAAAMMM!! it tells me im accepted!! =) haha i called my mom right away and she was super happy for me. and now that im over in california..i can be closer to the friend i want to see most =) and of course...its CALIFORNIA, L.A...WHAT ISNT THERE TO BE EXCITED ABOUT!! haha the only thing is...ill be stuck dorming which kinda sucks cause i dont kno who my roommate would be since all the friends i kno are graduating this year or have already gradated =/ i hope i dont get some freak haha but i realy want to live with my friend who's quite close by..but shes goin to some art school and shes gonna rent an apartment so we could share..? i really hope the school board will let!!! haha i cannot be goin to school and sleepin there for 5-6 years all year round...i would die =p

so anyways, i got a project due tomorow and me and my partner dont have an idea yet on what we're doing...and we're plannin on meeting up at 9pm and who knows what time we'll be done. haha but thats the thing about my class...we always wing everything and end up doin okay or pretty good but never a fail LOL i jus hope he doesnt fall asleep or anything cause we're so doomed tomorw =/ i hate making up skits...especially when they have to be all religious and stuff >.>

well..im off to do some studyin for a test i just remembered like now that i have tomorw O_o thank goodness for my good memory xD

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

May.11/2010

im loving the weather lately!!! =) lets keep it up kay! haha but i see some clouds...so mr. clouds, you better disappear if you dont want to see me upset.....^_^

so today, we took our grad pictures..part 2 xD we wore a dress and a gown with a hat. the teachers werent happy at all tho...cause alot of us missed their classes jus to get ready and stuff but whatever. its jus one time...so stop hating!! haha. today was alot of fun i gotta admit..running around cause everyone wants me to do their hair and what not..thank god i brought my hair curler and straightner...some of those girls hair needs some real treatment O_o ever heard of conditioner!!? ....anyways, at the end, we took our group picture with the whole class and the principal so happened to be there and was telling all the girls to wear a sweater on top of our dresses. most of us were wearing either sphagetti straps or tube top dresses and it was "revealing too much"...like honestly, you're jus mad cause you cant wear something like that..you fatass bitch!! ......thats right...your rule is that if you cant wear it, then we cant either. well you know what...you're like 450pounds so obvs you cant wear nothing. you jealous ho! ugh seriously..

okay well none of us were happy...not even the guys..they were soo pissed for us and like WTF to the teachers. like really...how seductive can our shoulders be?!! ugh, anyways more update to come...but dinner calls me and i need to please my stomach or else it doesnt cooperate with me =p ta-ta~

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

May.4/2010

i guess my day has been goin alright so far...way better than last night anyways >.> i really dont get what her problem is..mayb shes having a bad day so everything little thing jus seems to be gettin on her nerves..but why take it out on me..? ..i guess half of those little things relate to me..im a walking target!! =/

so anyways, the sun is out and trying to shine through the clouds..but mister wind wont seem to go away!! but other than the weather its been goin pretty good. i had a lunch date with a friend today and he made me laugh so much that i totally forgot all my worries...or alittle while anyway =p and then i had the best catching up time with my best cousin in the whole wide wooorld!! haha i love her so much..what will do i do next year when we're not in school together..T.T

i love coming to school everyday having someone sing to me and make songs about me jus randomly =) john..im gonna miss you next year..but mayb we'll end up in the same university!! haha except you'll be like 24..and ill be 18 =p anyways, grad is coming up and deadlines are arriving. i cant wait till the actual grad dates to come but im sooo excited for the following months!! i jus want school days to pass by faster so i can get to the fun part before the actual school begins in september =/

Thursday, April 29, 2010

April.29/2010

finally, the sun has decided to stay for the week..but the wind wont seem to go away jus yet =/ but i guess it helps in a way..blows away all the clouds! =)

i am so excited for this month!! theres so much going on and ...and...its jus goin to be alot of fun!haha well actually there isnt much but atleast i dont have to stay around at home and do nothing! so lets see..this weekend..i was suppose to play pool with a friend but i kinda bailed on him so..shh! cause im goin to dinner elsewhere and im not really in the mood for pool. its a very time consuming game but meh. and then next weekend, im plannin to either go on a weekend cruise with my dads side of the fam or to my friends house for a BBQ party. apprently, the guys in my class have been guys night out and this time they want the girls to join in so yay for party! haha but the theme is beach so they expect girls in bikinis and guys in board shorts but what the hey! and then the weekend after that, my friend is having a birthday party cause shes turning 18 and in the filipino culture, when you turn 18 it means your officially an adult so..theres like a huuge party. ANNND THEEENNN, the weekend after that, its a long weekend and im goin camping with my church and toher churches all over the world are goin too and ive never been before but im sure it'll be tons of fun!! haha meet new people..here i coommmee!! and finally, after that weekend..the very last weekend of the month, im goin on a roadtrip that got cancelled at the beginnin of april...so hopefully the weather is even better and it'll go well!!

so much to do..but all fun stuff!! haha im gone like every weekend next month..and its mothers day..and my moms bday....what will i do with presents and money!! @.@ anyways, the World Cup for soccer is coming up and my friend asked me to go watch with him but...i have no clue about soccer or the world cup for that matter. haha and now im on the internet searching up some information so i dont look like a dofus when hes talkin to me about it xD and im suppose to be studying for provincials but hey! everyone needs a break right?...right! haha yay for slacking off...again =.=

anyways, my 4 hours of spare is almost up and its time to go to my last class...ENGLISH >=l haha screw u provincials!! haha until next time~

Sunday, April 25, 2010

April. 25/2010

i know that ive been slacking off alot..but i didnt realize it was this much!! i only have about 2 months left and i need to stay on track and focus on nothing but school at this moment. *sigh* thats goin to be difficult...theres so much hapenin in may and then june will be busy with grad stuff...no time to do anything!! =/

i finally did my ACT test on friday and holy moly...its the hardest thing i have ever done! and right when i was done..i swear, if i ever see another ovally bubble sheet for multiple choice questions..i will kill myself!! no joke. but im soo glad its over with at this moment but now, i gotta wait for them to mail me the results and stuff and...im soo nervous!! @.@ but i heard the schools dont really look at the scores..they mainly jus want to kno ur education level..and mine is like..all the wayy down there..like below below average haha =p good luck to mee then!!

i went grad dress shopping with my mom today and it didnt take me very long to find the dress i bought. i walked right into the store and looked at a few then the sales person said..i think this'll look good on you and i fell in love with it =) i mean its not like..omg drop dead gorgeous..but its something...well...its jus something i like! haha its like sky blue..kinda tight at the top then kinda flows out at the bottom. i post a picture but..it looks bad so..ill jus wait til grad day comes! =) anyways, we got the dress for a really good price!! it was originally $700 but i got it for $375! my mom was like..u can wear it for ur wedding too!! ...=.= so now all thats left is to look for shoes! hah i would say accesories but i dont even kno if im allowed...since our school is a private school..and since theres no jewellery allowed in school..=S they better make an acception!!!! we're already not having prom cause of the whole dancing rule >=l but anyways, back to accersories!...my mom bought all these accesories for me from swaroski from her cruise trip. and now im still lookin for a hairstyle and a place to do that!...and hopefully at the same place, they can do my make up cause i dont want to go to like a million different places to get a million different things done..but other than all that, IM EXCITED!!!! =)

there are soo many things i need/want to get! eg. new glasses(with the whole black frame around..), new contacts(black this time instead of blue..), possibly braces..!?, and..uhm...okay well i forgot the rest but theres a whole lot more! and theres soo many places i want to go like after grad...during the summer before school starts all over again!! =/ i want but i kno i cant..go to holland T.T and then im plannin on goin to san fran either with my parents over the summer or with some friends in october!! well..san fran is one of the stops..but its like touring everywhere..ROADTRIP!!! haha oh and dont worry BL, theres nothing to be worried/nervous about..we can always jus sit around staring at each other..doing nothing..haha jus keedin..YOU BETTER PLAN SOMETHING WEN I GET THERE OR ELSE IM MAKING YOU TAKE ME EVERYWHERE!!! MWAHAHA =p but yeah..im excited for summer =)

anyways, im off to study for my retest on english terms =/ i hate that test...ive done it like twice already!! anyways bye for now~

:: i wish i could help you in everyway..but im sorry that i cant. but my spirit will always be there for you! ^_^ ::

Monday, April 19, 2010

April.19/2010

i couldnt even wake up this morning!! so last night..i was watching two movies with my cousin and when the second movie started i was already starting to fall asleep zzZZ near the middle of the movie, i jus passed out and my cousin didnt even realize till like near the end that she was talkin to herself most of the time! haha i felt soo bad but i was soo tired =/

so anyways, she woke me up this morning at like 6:30 so i can get stuff ready and all that and i ended up waking up at 7:30 and we almost missed the bus going to school O_o haha who said i cant get ready in like 45-50 mins!? =p so anyways, we had breakfast and headed to the bus stop and made it to school jus in time =)

my mother is finally returning to me tmr and im planning on making her curry chicken for dinner! haha ive only watched from afar so hopefully, nobody gets sick tomorow! man, i seem to get better and better at this whole cooking thing xD i can be a chef when im like...40!! haha yeah right..

okay well im off to do some homework <---yeah its been like soo long since ive done that...i always say im goin to do it but i never end up working on it..and now..for the first time in awhie, im goin to do some homework =/ haha wish me luck~

Sunday, April 18, 2010

April.18/2010

the sun is finally out and it feels just right =) dont go anywhere mister sunshine!!

so this is the last weekend that ill be home alone cause my parents are finally returning from their trip on tues! haha it passed by so fast and im not even ready to have them come home yet =/ well anyways, i hope they leave again soon so i can do this again! haha

i cant believe im graduating soon...recently at school, we've been doing all those grad write-ups, speeches and all that grad stuff and it just made me realize that..its really happening!! and im soo excited to get out!! haha but i still havent found a dress yet..partially cause im waiting on my mom to come with me which we will hopefully do soon! im so excited for the parties and everything..even just the planning is alot of fun =p

anyways, im off to clean some more of this house...and im goin out soon to have dinner with my first stepdad which i havent seen in like 3, 4 years? im excited but nervous at the same time..

:: thinking about you 24/7..is it wrong..? ::

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

April.14/2010

and tonight..i will cry myself to sleep. i dont know why but it seems this is how the night will end for me. so good night and hello puffy eyes...i wonder what kind of dreams ill have tonight..or if ill even have any..

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

April.13/2010

i had the best sleep last night!! haha but i was soo into my sleep that i didnt even hear my alarm clock this morning..

i had alot of dreams last night but i couldnt remember any of them. not even alittle bit of any =/ sometimes i wonder...where do dreams come from? how do they work? do they mean something or are they just stories in your head that have no effect in your life..i really do wonder.

so anyways, i was still alittle tired this morning so i decided to take alittle nap in chem class while we were reading notes out loud with the class. i really did fall asleep for the first time in school but i kept waking up kinda scared that the teacher would find out but he didnt. the class period finally ended and i woke up with a swollen eye. it looked like i had a bite on my lower eye lid. mayb it was a consequence for sleeping in class =p but anyways, its like super itchy but i cant do anything about it and the guys are so funny xD everytime i come close to touching my eye, two of them tell me not to and like smack my hand like i was alittle child...and another jus keeps trying to blow into my eye to "make it feel better" LOL i think he wouldve gave me an eye infection xD but they're so caring even though they can be goofs at times =)

so the sun decides to leave us here in vancouver these days but i only hope it goes to one place instead. SAN FRAN!! haha well anyways, i have a eng test to study for and i only have about 5 minutes left =/ bye for now~

Monday, April 12, 2010

April. 12/2010

thank goodness it wasnt raining this morning on the way to school or else i wouldnt have been a very happy girl ...although im not very happy at the moment but...meh

so i was up til 6 last night..or should i say this morning and woke up at 6:30 to shower and get ready to leave to school cause i had to take the bus with my cousin today. time flew by soo fast...one minute i was doing something then next minute its like time to wake up!! and i was thinkin that mayb i shouldnt sleep that half an hour but my eyes jus refused to cooperate with me...and right now, im falling asleep in class wanting a nap soo badly but i have no spares today =/ actually, i had a spare this morning but i used that to work on my bible homework which i totally forgot about...=S i still have soo much to do and i was suppose to do them on the weekend but i ended up not doin it so....im in soo much trouble.

report cards are coming out.....im gonna be dead soon......WHAT DO I DO!?!?!?!?!?!? why have i slacked off so much lately...i honestly cant handle all this freedom...I NEED RESTRICTIONS!!! >=l ...i cant believe i jus said that but...=/ i honestly cant do anything when theres no one to tell me to get off the computer or get off the phone or turn the the tv off or do this and do that. mommy where are u wen i need you =/...well, i talked with her this morning and shes in aruba...enjoying the blazing hot sun while im here soaking in tears cause im such a failure! i really am hopeless on my own...i wont survive.

i just hope this school year ends soon and i wont have to worry about this anymore and i can start over and start fresh. this highschool thing really feels like a burden and i cant wait to get rid of it. I WANT LIFE TO BE OVER!! ugh...life~

Saturday, April 10, 2010

April.10/2010

the weather has finally decided to let the sun come out and play for the weekend =) please dont go away..=/

well im kinda bummed out about this weekend even though the sun is out...i was suppose to go on this roadtrip with my church youth and apprently theres a snow storm up at whislter or something so..the driving conditions arent ideal for driving...and now, we'll have to possibly wait til may!! =/ and i was soo excited and even packed for it! and then it cancelled last minute..T.T sometimes, i really do wonder about mother nature =p

so apparently next week, im planning on meeting up with my first stepdad since years!! and honestly, im excited but extremely nervous at the same time...i remember in the summer, wen i talked to him on the phone, i cried and everytime i bump into him at the supermarket, i cant help but tear up alittle =/ i love and miss him so much..but i guess ill see him and its perfect timing cause my mom isnt here and she wont know about this or else..im dead ANND!! he doesnt kno im coming..he jus thinks hes having dinner with my auntie =) im excited!!!

anyways, im off to do something outside to enjoy the beautiful sunshine...even though it is abit windy but that wont stop mee!! haha

:: hope youre safe and having fun =) cant wait til sunday =p ::

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

April. 6/2010

waking up this morning was the weirdest thing ever! i set my alarm clock to 7:30 and my dad calls me a minute before my alarm to see if i had awaken yet. but for some reason, wen i answered the call, in my head it was either sat or sun so when he asked "ur still not up!?" i jus replied "no need to wake up so early!" haha and then i realized it was tues...time for school =/

school was soo hectic today. i used most of my classes to finish my grad transitions and yet im still missing some stuff! i need my parents signature but..theyre not here and so yeah but i handed it in anyway and when she goes through it...i guess we'll talk O_o the scariest thing is that, im not use to handing in stuff for her to check/mark. and "she" is the principal =S she has like MAJOR mood swings..i swear, shes the scariest thing you would ever meet! haha and not to mention, totally bipolar~

anyways, im glad that i got most of the stuff complete so now i can concentrate on other stuff that i need to catch up on or atleast start doing. ive been wayy too relaxed and need to get my head together. im glad my parents arent here this month..then i can atleast stay up til whenever and can possibly get some stuff done...=S

im loving the weather today!!! =) haha i jus want to thank my friend *cough*brandon*cough* for wishing/hoping that the clouds and the rain would come our way because its awwesome! haha =p but its still alittle cold but hey! atleast its not raining!!

so im goin to go do this so called homework thing now...haha its such nonesense and so UNNECESSARY!! everyone would agree =)....well the students anyway =p

Sunday, April 4, 2010

April.4/2010

its been such a good weekend so far =) didnt get much done but hey, its the long weekend!!

so before the folks left, i saw them one last time at the airport. how? well let me explain =)
i was sleepin over at my aunties house on friday and my uncle had to drive my other auntie to the airport so i decided to tag along and give my mom a surprise. so i woke up at 4:30ish and left for the airport. it was soo funny cause i was helping my auntie carry her luggage and while im running to my mom, i was yelling "im cooming with yooouu" xD she jus looked at me like "omg how did u get here!? what r u doin here!?" but it was the best moment ever =) so we finally said our goodbyes and i left to go back to my aunties. but i couldnt fall back to sleep so i jus watched tv..which totally sucked cause there was NOTHING on at that time =/ but luckily there was internet there so =)

me and my cousin finally settled in at home and it feels kinda weird xD like im use to staying home alone at times but im jus so use to the fact that my parents will come home sooner or later in the day but now..they wont be. i wont be expecting them anytime soon and ...i cant say that its a sad thing but ...its jus alittle new to me xD but its been fun..? haha me and my cousin are soo unproductive!!!! =) we havent done anything at all...except watch movies, eat, watch some more movies and then eat some more! haha but we did the laundry today so =) i jus wish it was the summer..wouldve been soo much better! cant wait til then! =)

well, im off to watch another movie and eat some more food before the night ends..except the fact that its a neverending night for me today =/ ill be up all night talking to a certain someone =) good luck to me!

Friday, April 2, 2010

April.2/2010

its soo windy outside..im soo scared that my house will fall down soon! O_o i actually dont mind the wind and rain..jus as long as theres no thunder or lightning =/

today was such a tiring day! i didnt sleep til 1ish 2 and then some random guy came over early in the morning to check on something at the house and he was soo loud that i couldnt sleep. and finally, after what seemed like forever, he had decided to leave and i quickly went back to bed. but then an hour or so later, my mom comes in to wake me up =/ but i didnt get up til awhile later...not quite sure why. i wasnt really sleepin or anything but i guess jus thought, if i didnt get up and start the day, then the day wouldnt go by..and i wouldnt have to say goodbye at the end..but eventually, i got up and cleaned the house and did chores all day long..so now im super exhausted! but now the house is nice and clean =)

its almost dinner time and my parents are packing =/ i have to leave in an hour or so and then its time for the goodbyes and possibly some waterworks =p my moms been explaining the rules to me and everything since 20minutes ago and she just keeps goin on and on about pretty much the same thing xD i can tell she doesnt want to leave me here...but its okay mom! ill do jus fine hehe

anyways, im sleepin over at my cousins house tonight or else i have no ride to church tomorow so im off to pack as well! lol goodbye mommy, ill miss you =/ goodbye stepdaddy, buy me lots of stuff =) goodbye aunties and uncles, have fun!

Thursday, April 1, 2010

April.1/2010

i think it kinda sucks to have your birthday on april fools day...but it doesnt seem to bother my friend tiffany...HBD bestee =) but im soo glad its over at 12noon cause i cant stand all those pranks and jokes all day long..it can get so irritating..espcially when you have friends who are soo annoying and get all dumb about it..

so instead of goin to richmond on friday and getting my moms lashes done..it happened yesterday and i sat for 2 and abit hours jus waiting for her..although i really liked the place but still!! so we ended up leaving that salon place at like 8ish and decided to eat some taiwanese food...yumm =)

its finally the long weekend and i jus realized that i still havent taken my math test with me...i usually get help on it with my tutor since its not really a "test" but i only get to see my tutor once this whole month and its this long weekend and report cards come out the 3rd week of april...=S i really seem to have a habit of leaving things to the last minute and then my forgetfulness jus has to kick in =/ IM SOO DOOMED!! O_o

but other than the bad news, im excited for this weekend =) its gonna be awwesome..except for the fact that i have to stay up all night for TWO WHOLE DAYS!!!! @.@ how will i ever survive..? if something hapens..im blaming you >=l thats right..im talkin to you brandon!!

anyways im heading out...let you kno more of what hapens wen it hapens!

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

March.31/2010

the weather has finally decided to make me happy today =) and I am soo glad theres one more day of school left and then the long weekend to look forward to!

so guess what I did in woodworking class this time..!? the absolute same thing as last class...nothing! the teacher is jus too busy helping other people that theres no time for me..and even he noticed himself...but he says hes not paying as much attention cause I kno what I'm doin and I'm so far ahead already so...I guess thats a good thing? =p but it's sad to say that this is the only class I could be happy about. I have soo much to do and the deadlines are all coming up soon! =/ and yet I'm doing absolutely nothing about it and jus sitting on my couch watching Mulan =) haha I'm so dead..

there are badminton tryouts today afterschool and I really wantedto stay and join but...idk why I didn't =/ I guess ill jus join their practices hehe but I always seem to whip myself on the leg with the racket =/ so now my legs as u can imagine are all bruisey xD and for some strange reason, today at school was like baby-ville haha all the teachers who went on mat leave all came to visit today and they're soo adorable!!

kay well I'm off to enjoy my Disney movie!! haha bye for now~

-really missing ur company these days....-

Monday, March 29, 2010

March.29/2010

for some random reason, i woke up alittle earlier than i was suppose to and didnt feel tired at all! haha but of course, as the day went by, i started getting sleepier and sleepier..i almost fell asleep in eng class!! xD

lately, ive been really excited about woodworking class since im almost done my mirror frame..ive got all the sides glued together and i was planning on nail gunning it together and then woodfilling the empty spots and then painting it and finally designing it. but sadly, i got absolutly nothing done the whole class period! the nail gun didnt work for some reason so we thought about jus hammering the nail in..but for some reason, the wood started splitting and of course, i didnt want that so we were trying all these different ways and then next thing you know, RIIIIIINNNNNNGGGG =/

since this is the last week that my parents will be here, i think we're eating out everyday...think about the MSG in all that food =S haha today i already ate out at some vietnamese restaurant..then tomorrow, my auntie is taking us out for some king crab..which im allergic to so yay for that! xD then wed im probably goin out for dinner before badminton and then thurs my mom and her friend are doin their nails so we're gonna eat out after that then friday, we're goin to have afternoon tea(yum cha) then my mom is doin her eyelashes and yeah. very exciting but now im actually kinda sad to see her go =/ LOL even though she is coming back and all...but i always get alittle teary whenever my mom leaves me..i jus love her so much =)

okay well, im off to do some psychology homework! =/ haha i havent touched that for months now...wonder how im doin so far =p wish me luck!

Sunday, March 28, 2010

March.28/2010

why must Sunday be such a boring day? I'm sitting here in my room, listening to music and theres nothing to do! =/ and I don't feel like doing much either =p the weather really does bring me down....but I've got badminton in abit so whether I like it or not...I've gotta get up and go.

it seems like it was jus yesterday when my parents and the adults jus started booking the cruise and hotels and what not. but now, in about 4-5days, they'll be off on a trip that they planned and waited for over a year now! time really does fly...with a blink of an eye, ill be married with kids and who knows what else! haha thats a scary thought xD

I've only got about 3-4 weeks left until report card comes out and I've done absolutely nothing! I've gotta start catching up before deadlines start happening but I always seem to find the time to do other stuff and never get any of my work done...which means I'm getting absolutely nowhere! somehow, I jus don't seem to care anymore now that I'm almost done..and that seems to be the way with my friends too. but that means slacking off and we can't afford to do any worse in this time period =/ must...keep...goin...

all I ever seem to be doin lately is eat and sleep...I'm always "too lazy" to do this or do that...but i've got to change that somehow and soon =S so now I'm off to badminton to work my ass off! haha catch ya later~

Saturday, March 27, 2010

March.27/2010

its only and finally saturday..! haha only one more day left of relaxation and then another week of school =/ but luckily its a short week and we have the long weekend!!

i finally got to sleep through the whole night yesterday and i guess i enjoyed it too much that i overslept xD by the time i got ready, it was already too late to go to church so i just decided to ditch it =p went to lunch with the fam and went for a "haircut". LOL hardly notice a difference cause i wouldnt dare to cut much off until grad is over but got talkin with my hair stylist about what to do with my hair when prom comes around and im soo excited! =) but what was really funny was while she was "talking" about what i should do and what she can help me with, she started demonstrating on me and curled my whole head! so i pretty much jus got my hair done for free today haha =p

im currently at my aunties house, jus finished dinner and tired as ever. all the adults are talkin about their trip next week and i get so excited to jus hear about it xD i think im goin on a trip myself the second week of april...some kind of roadtrip! =) so im not even alittle bit sad that they didnt decide to bring me...dont worry mom, ill try not to burn down the house while you're away and try not to miss me too much! hahaha

now im so full i can barely move..i better get on the treadmill for abit before i turn into the biggest pig in the world!! =p goodbye for now~

p.s hope you're having lots of fun now that your midterms are over! =p

Friday, March 26, 2010

March.26/2010

its finally friday and im excited for the weekend..even though ive got absolutely nothing planned, im jus glad i get to relax and jus do whatever =p

today at school was pretty chill..only had two classes in the morning then had spare til school was over! but of course, im not that dumb to stay in school for those 3 and a half hours so i went to the mall to chill with a friend. haha it was pretty fun..go to try on some grad/prom dresses and no offense to my friend but..I WISH YOU WERE A GIRL!! =/ like seriously, i needed advice and all he said was "its pretty...looks good"...thats what everyone says..i wanted honest opinion >=l but it was still fun!

so anyways, while i was at the mall, i went to this pet habitat store to look at the puppies even though ill never buy a dog at the store..but i jus wanted to check it out. and omg were the puppies there cuuute!! =) especially the pomeranian..but too bad it had to be white instead of golden brown. ive had a couple dogs back then and now im waiting on my mothers friends dog to breed! its a poodle cross maltese and its previous puppies were supa adorable and they dont grow til very big but the last one left was all black and i was not interested so now im patiently waiting...HURRY UP AND MAKE BABIES!!! XD hahaha

okay well..the weather seems to suck lately and the following days to come =/ "rain rain, go away, please come back another day" lol okay well, im off to enjoy my boring and gloomy weekend =)

Thursday, March 25, 2010

March.25/2010

okay so..i havent done one of these blog things in awhile..and reading back on my old ones..well, makes me see how silly i was back then =p

i am sooo glad school is over with in about 2-3months!!...well highschool anyway. i cant wait to get out and finally do something that i enjoy and work towards my goal. but i guess before post-secondary starts..i want to go on vacay and travel over the summer! =) number one place i guess would be san fran. never been and want to visit a special friend ;) then after that of course would be L.A but its never any fun when you're a minor =/ so i might as well go back to my hometown; holland! haha i miss everyone and everything there..

so i guess ill just leave it at that for tonight..havent been able to get much sleep these days so hopefully ill catch up on that over the weekend. OHH and..im SUUPA excited for april!! my parents are leaving on their cruise trip..(finally) and i get to stay here for 3 weeks! =) one word for ya: PAAAAARRRRTTTTYYYY =p