March.4/2012

hello world,
today has been such an exhausting day! i started work at 11am till 5pm and then again at 6pm till 830pm. i actually wouldn't mind working long hours if the store was busy but this new location that i'm working in is quiet. we always make our goal because the few people who come in always buy hundreds of dollars worth of stuff but its super quiet and it makes the day go by so s-l-o-w.
i learned a few things today: one, never share things you have been told or things you know with others unless necessary. you don't know who you can trust out there...even if you think they're you're closest friend. second, never assume things you hear or see. always go straight to the person or source and find out what's really going on because assuming will only make things worse.
sometimes i wonder if there is anyone out there who is genuine and real. i feel like even the closest people can be a little fake sometimes. i'm not saying im perfect because i know i can act like i'm okay with someone when i'm upset at them for something else. i just wish that people would know that if i'm real with them, i hope for the same in return.
lately, i feel like i need a change. i wouldn't say im fat but im not exactly skinny. i guess im average? i just feel like i want to lose some weight...not to be anorexic or anything. in fact, i dont even need to lose weight. if i could just lose some inches on my thighs and waist then i'd be happy =)but first off, i KNOW i need to go to the gym more often. sometimes i work late so i cant go with my mama to the gym so i go maybe twice a week. but i've set a goal for myself. for the days im not working, or im not working too late, i will still go...even by myself! i want to atleast be able to fit into a size 1 or 0 and right now, i'm a size 3. which im not super unhappy about because i use to be a size 5 or even 7! i just need to start eating right ...(im just snacking too much) and exercising more. so hopefully, i will reach my goal. thing is though, my upper body is thinner than my lower body...if that makes sense. i could fit into an xs or s in shirts but i can't fit into a 0 or 1 in pants (-__-) annd, i feel like i need to change my wardrobe around. i love the clothes i have but i feel like most of them make me look like im still in highschool. when i meet random people, they still think im in highschool...i want to dress...i guess more mature and look like im in my 20s. i know it's not only about dressing the part but i dont want people to look at me and say oh she looks about 16 or 17...i'm 19 and i know that's only 2 or 3 years difference but still...i dont like to be called a highschooler...